The skinny on the author, er, uh, me: I'm the author of the, slightly twisted, Shakespearean comedy Naked Metamorphosis
. My publisher is Eraserhead Press, whom I adore. I have dogs, but hate to claim I "own" them, as I find it degrading to them. And, I have a hefty appetite for beer. Those are the particulars, take 'em or leave 'em. Oh, and one other thing, today is my birthday (if you want to get me a gift stroll over to Amazon.com and post a review of the book or purchase a copy. Both are exactly what I wanted this year).Here are your questions:
Fans: Sunrise or Sunset?
Eric Mays: Well, I'm not a fan of either. Truth to tell, I'm not a fan of sun, in general. Maybe that's why I've got a pale complexion. Did you know there are people who purposefully deprive themselves of sunlight in order to achieve the pale look? It's true. And, I'm not that crazy.
Sunlight tends to offer me a migraine (thanks, in part, to a partially detached retina). If I had my wishes, I'd restructure the day so that it starts at 7pm and runs until 9am. Just to avoid it.
I'm avoiding the question, though. Since I'm no fan of sunlight, let me answer the question the way a vampire would. I would have to opt for Sunrise. That way, whether the sun comes up at 6am or 8am, I would at least know that I had a little time to make it into the shadows.
Fans: Do you have a literary nemesis?
EM: I wish I had a large enough following to pick feuds like this. I'll throw down now and maybe, just maybe, I'll make a Google search. Who knows, a lawsuit from someone could do wonders!
I do not have a nemesis, per se, though Stephanie Meyer is mighty close. There are a lot of authors that I despise, a bit. Mainly because I think they're hacks. In the world of my imagination there's a an "Evil League" of baddies that's made up of John Grisham, James Patterson, Dan Brown, and Stephanie Meyer. I'm just one of the "Justice League" writers trying to conquer them one book at a time. (Don't worry, kids, I brought back-up: Kevin Shamel, Jordan Krall, David Barbee, and loads more)
Fans: Who is your biggest influence?
EM: This is tough. When I was growing up I thought it was Tolkein. I loved the trilogy, but adored "The Hobbit" more. I began writing fantasy epics. I didn't want to publish anything unless it was at least seven books and a thousand pages. By that statement, some would wager I was inspired by Charles Dickens. In the high school years I was inspired by Stephen King and Roger Zelazny and Ray Bradbury. My writing grew a little darker, but I hated everything I put on paper.
When I finally achieved my "identity" as a writer (knew what my strengths were) I realized I was inspired by some of my favorite writers: Carl Hiaasen, Terry Pratchett, Tom Robbins, Mark Twain, Elmore Leonard, and a dash of James Morrow. I'm always inspired though, more modernly, by Christopher Moore, Tim Sandlin, Eric Garcia, Bill Fitzhugh, and authors that can play with a phrase. I love humor. I actually adore horror, too. But don't write it.
Fans: What was the single greatest thing about publishing "Naked Metamorphosis"
EM: Besides Google searching my name for an ego boost? Receiving congratulatory emails from Chris Moore and Bill Fitzhugh. Also, reading reviews by readers whom I've never met.
Fans: If you were Sookie Stackhouse whose team would you be on? Eric, Bill, or Quinn?
EM: Well, if I were Sookie Stackhouse I would be in heaven. It's amazing, isn't it? You've got the one cute waitress in one of the most white-trashy settings...no wonder she's pursued by so many suitors. Oh the things that would do to my ego!
I've got to say - and it's rare that I say this - I'm partial to the television series over the books. That said, I'll have to go Team Bill. Yes, he's all seriousness and conflicted, but you've always got a handle on where he stands on a situation. Eric's a bit two-faced. I think he's a gorgeous specimen, but you never know what's bubbling under the surface. And Quinn? Well, he's a little too attached to his sis for my comfort. I know that the Bill in the books and Bill in the show are slightly different. So, let's just go with Bill.
Fans: What was the first book to make you cry?
EM: Since I referenced dogs above, I'm imagining you're thinking it would be something like "Old Yeller". I had major issues and fears of death as a child. It got worse in my teenage years. Weird? I don't know. So books where a major character died didn't affect me in a sad way, just more of an uncomfortable way. I got very uncomfortable with death. (In a nonsequitar sort of moment, this is really weird, because I always wanted cancer when I was younger. I contribute this to Irene, a girl in my class at the school. She disappeared for a long time and there were tons of rumors. Then she comes back all bald and we find out she had leukemia. Well, Irene was spoiled with gifts. Plus, she was a little bit of a celebrity. I envied that so much!)
I never really was impacted with that emotional punch to the belly until I entered adulthood, I think. Is that sad? I remember crying during "The Sparrow". I definitely cried during Cormac McCarthy's "The Road". But the first book I cried during...I'm really not sure.
Fans: Is there a genre that needs to go away?
EM: The "animal memoir" genre needs to be put down. I get that people love their dogs. I love my dogs. I really, really do. "Marley and Me" is not a good book. It's horrendous. And, it's really more whining from the "owners" of Marley, and less about the dog. Really? You have kids, and a mortgage, and you're bouncing from different jobs, and the dog ate the floor! Boo-hoo! Ever stop and think about the friggin' dog? The dog who's not being walked or acknowledged thanks to the interferences of life?
There are a few good ones. But everything from Orson the Border Collie to Marley the lab just needs to stop. It's the same story, over and over and over and over...
Fans: Why does a chicken coop have only two doors?
EM: Really? Because if it had four doors it would be a chicken sedan. C'mon. I'm king of bad jokes. I still tell them.
Fans: With the publishing industry collapsing, why books?EM: Well, books are pure. Let me explain...
When I was younger I had to find solace in something. I always did in the movies and in books. Movies I adore. But books you can touch. You can smell. They become an extension of yourself.
I am famously against technology (most people know this about me, and I don't care what you think). I don't own an iPod (or an iAnything for that matter). I don't enjoy watching TV or movies on a computer. I'm still partial to a typewriter than a computer. And, I loathe e-books and the Kindle. This is the future; I've just not assimilated yet.
Why books? It's always been a dream of mine. And, now, regardless of anything else, I can say I achieved something I wanted to.
Fans: Who is the best author that nobody's heard of?
EM: I don't know. I love Jordan Krall and many other Eraserhead Press authors (no, my publisher did not ask me to say that). But, many of them have cult followings. That's like asking me what the best movie I've never seen is. It's shocking, but most people I come into contact with don't know who Christopher Moore is. Joe R. Lansdale's got a huge following, but in comparison to the national average...
Fans: What is your favorite book?
EM: That's not a toughie! By far, my favorite book is "The Sparrow" by Mary Doria Russell. I'm not sure why. I've re-read my copy easily twenty times and it never loses anything. If anything, it has a strong emotional chord with me. I adore this book. And, if you've not read it, don't hesitate to pick it up. It's well worth the money.
Very close second, and nearly tied, are "Stiff" by Mary Roach, "Towing Jehovah" by James Morrow, "Lamb" by Christopher Moore, and "Like Water for Chocolate".
Fans: Who is your favorite author?
EM: I have too many to list here. I adore Russian lit - Stanislaw Lem, Nabakov, and too many others. "The Nose" by Gogol is one of my favorite short stories.
As far as sci-fi is concerned, nobody tops Ray Bradbury and Philip K. Dick (my opinion).
Horror's a veritable who's who. I can't pinpoint one. My favorite zombie fiction writer is Brian Keene; For gritty and grizzly I'll do a toss up and say Ed Lee or Jack Ketchum; And, of course, there's the Robert McCammon.
Thanks, kids for writing to me. You really made me feel the love. I appreciate that more than you'll probably guess.
Tomorrow on the Authors Speak, one of my favorite writers: Christopher Moore. Chris has a huge following, his books are bestsellers, and he's one of the funniest writers working. We chat the differences between zombies and vampires (and why they're so hot right now), his latest book Bite Me: A Love Story, and his take on the biz.
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